Satisfaction x Competence
Com-Sa-Window
As a psychologist, I’m one of those crazy people who actually enjoys designing and (yes!) completing surveys. Before I scare you too much, let me explain. I like surveys because they make us think. Surveys are an invitation to slow down and to reflect on how we think and how we feel. When we hit “pause” on our rat-race lives, we often discover things that have gone unnoticed. The value of a good survey lies in its ability to increase our power of noticing. Last year, a colleague introduced me to a beautifully simple assessment. It invites us to reflect on our Satisfaction and Competence in a number of domains of life. What I love about this format is that it motivates action. Give it a try: For example, map out your Satisfaction x Competence in the domain of Work Relationships: Where do you land? Here are a few examples shared by my clients:
Alicia: High Satisfaction, High Competence
Alicia loves getting to know people. Relationships are very important to her, and as a result of prioritizing relationship-building among her peers, team members, and other stakeholders, she reports that she is highly satisfied with the relationships she has built. She also feels highly competent in this domain – she knows how to build relationships. Time and again, she has run into difficulties with different personalities and perspectives. Each of these experiences was an opportunity to strengthen her relational skills. The Satisfaction x Competence window helped Alicia see that relationship-building is one of her signature strengths — a skill she can leverage across her leadership challenges.
Bill: High Satisfaction, Low Competence
Like Alicia, Bill is very satisfied with his relationships. He has very strong ties with many of his colleagues and with key stakeholders. Unlike Alicia, Bill does not feel highly competent in this domain. While he is satisfied with the relationships he has, he has given up on trying to improve his relationships with a number of people in his life. The Satisfaction x Competence window helped Bill see that work relationships are one of his blind spots. He realized that while it was easy for him to focus on his strong work relationships, there were many relationships that he didn’t feel capable of improving; as a result, others would describe him as closed, uncaring, and even avoidant.
Lui: Low Satisfaction, High Confidence to Improve
Lui, by contrast, had identified work relationships as something he needed to improve. He realized that he rarely made time for people. He had received feedback that he was too focused on results, that he pushed key stakeholders out of the way to accomplish his goals. The feedback hurt Lui deeply, because he knew he could make friends with just about anyone. The Satisfaction x Competence window helped Bill to see the “shadow side” of his relational skills; he began to recognize the difference between leveraging relationships and abusing them.
Dani: Low Satisfaction, Low Confidence to Improve
It was clearly difficult for Dani to share that she felt neither happy with her work relationships nor competent in this domain. Painful memories of being left out of work cliques came to mind as Dani shared that she had sworn off having friends at work. The Satisfaction x Competence window helped Dani realize that it was time to shift her perspective – to explore how she might connect with her colleagues in meaningful ways. As you can see, the Satisfaction x Competence "window" provides meaningful direction and energizes improvement. And don’t stop with Work Relationships – insert a number of meaningful domains of life, and see what you can discover. If you’re interested in learning more, please consider joining me for a FREE WEBINAR on Tuesday, November 15 at 3PM EST. Click here to register!
